anxiety, asd, autism, dance, depression, diet, excercise, general, health, health and fitness, lifestyle, mental health, metnal health, post natal depression, special needs, wellbeing

Who am I and why do I want to volunteer with Tots & Tums?

I,m Louise, I’m 39, and I am a mum of three gorgeous children, and married to Andrew.

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Me and my youngest, Emily

When people ask me ‘what I do’ I’m never quite sure what to say. I mean it’s easy to tell someone you work in retail, or in education, or something along those lines, but I write, and I blog, and I probably use social media way more that society suggests I probably should.

But I do all of those with reason and my intentions are always to spread messages of positivity and hope for those who may need it.

I do this because I have suffered with mental health issues pretty much all my adult life. Once I hit 16, I went off the rails and spiralled into a life which I can see now, is not the kind of life any mother would ideally want their daughter to have.

I had my first child at 21, ended up a single parent at 22, got into relationships with the wrong kind of people, made bad choices, found myself in not exactly ideal situations, but luckily I decided to try and make something of my life by going back into education at 26 once my son started school.

I met my now husband just before I turned 30 and as I was about to graduate from uni, and from then I finally got my life back on track, or more or less. We had our first child together in November 2008, then our second child September 2011.

Our oldest daughter was diagnosed with autism in April 2015, and it was at that point I said I was going to change my life. I had answers now. I’d spent so many years anxious, worrying, stressing. We had answers, a diagnosis and I needed to move forward.

So I set about making changes to my life, little by little and I can say now that I am completely through my depression. I still have moments of anxiety, but I think we all do, and I am now aware of how to control them.

I started by working towards fulfilling my childhood ambition of becoming a journalist and signed up to a distance learning course. From this I pushed myself to travel down to London on my own to do workshops, then smashed another barrier by taking my first exam, and passing. I then made myself completely familiar with my surroundings and what is going on in the area, what’s topical? What do people want to read about?, and started writing feature articles for newspapers and magazines.

I then started blogging and sharing my personal experiences of being an autism mum and living with depression and anxiety. I then took up exercise and it’s through that which I’ve made so many friends. Which brings me where I am today…

Beating depression has made me want to help others beat it too. I want to find people who have lost their way in life, and help them find it again. But I don’t want to do it sat in an office, taking notes, or as an employee who’s able to listen, but not able to give advice.

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I want to do it as me. As the girl who woke up one day and decided to take her life back. I want to find men and women who have lost all belief in themself, lost their identity, lost their path in life. I want these people realise their self-worth, identify their dreams, break their comfort zones and achieve them.

I want to be someone who helps reduce the mental health stats which fill me with tears every single time I read them. I want to be someone who makes a difference to the world, I want to potentially save lives.

And I want to do it all by sharing my experiences of kicking mental health issues and give others the confidence and belief that they can do it too.

anxiety, celebrity, depression, general, health, mental health, wellbeing

Nailing Mental Health

 

1 in 4 people will experience a mental health problem in any given year

9 out of 10 people with mental health problems experience stigma and discrimination

Somebody loses their life every TWO HOURS due to mental health

For every one female to take their own life due to mental health struggles, 4 men take theirs

In 2015 in the UK and ROI 6,078 people suffering with mental health issues, took their own life

2015 is also the year I finally took back control of my life, and fought the hardest battle I ever have, and won.

This is why when asked by Beauty Therapist Alison Mitchell,

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Alison Mitchell, just one of the 350 nail techs who’ll be taking part in the event

if I could give a little assistance promoting an upcoming event aimed at raising awareness surrounding mental health and to raise funds to go towards the provision of care of those suffering, I’m all behind it.

A celebrity nail artist from Dartford, Kent, has set up event  ‘Nailing Mental Health’, which will be taking place on Sunday 2nd April at InterContinental O2 Hotel, London from 10.30am where herself and approximately 350 nail techs will attempt to break a world record by doing at least 6,078 shapes and paints in green glitter, which is the colour of the mental heath ribbon, over 8 hours to mark each of the lives lost to mental illness.

Stephanie Staunton, whilst suffering her own battles, came up with the idea after suffering a break down and suicide attempt in August 2016. Stephanie, and her team aim to raise £30K, with a donation of £5 from each person who has their nails painted, and the funds raised will go towards MIND, Samaritans and Stephanies charity ‘Nailing Mental Health’.

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Stephanie Stuanton showing support with green nails

All funds raised will be used to cover the cost of therapy which will be offered to those suffering with mental health issues, as current waiting lists on the NHS can be anything between 12-18weeks, which can have devastating consequences.

But the event is just as much about raising awareness as it is funds. More shocking statistics show that

1 in 10 children and young people aged 5 – 16 suffer from a diagnosable mental health disorder – that is around three children in every class.

Between 1 in every 12 and 1 in 15 children and young people deliberately self-harm 

There has been a big increase in the number of young people being admitted to hospital because of self harm. Over the last ten years this figure has increased by 68%.

This is why we need to act, and we need to act now. We need more understanding around the issues surrounding mental health, and how we can help. We need more funding to provide the potentially life save care these people desperately need.

The event has already drawn some celebrity support, with some names set to attend on the day. But there is still an urgent need of nail techs to help set this record, which will be judged by Guinness Book of Records), and members of the public to attend the venue to have their nails painted.

To be part of this event and help raise awareness of mental health issues and funds for the charity, contact Stephanie via the Nailing Mental Health Facebook group.

http://www.nailingmentalhealth.org.uk

info@nailingmentalhealth.org.uk

Instagram @nailingmentalhealth

 

 

anxiety, dance, depression, diet, excercise, general, health, health and fitness, lifestyle, mental health, post natal depression, wellbeing

A week of inspiration

At some point in your life, you will be lucky enough to meet someone who inspires you. Someone who in some way contributes to making you a better person. They will make you want to strive for things you always dreamed of and help you realise what really matters in life.

Not only will they be a role model, but they will also be one of the best and most genuine people you will ever have the pleasure and privilege of meeting.

I’m lucky. I have grown such a strong circle of friends over a very short period of time, and every single one of them fills my life with so much happiness and they are all helping me create memories.And I can’t possibly go a single day without talking to or seeing at least one of them.

But this week, I’ve been left feeling completely in awe and so inspired by three of them in particular, and this blog is for them.

Firstly, Debra. Debra very sadly lost her sister to a brain tumour in March 2015. I’m sure she won’t mind me sharing that. She has since dedicated all her time to fundraising for Marie Curie Care, the charitable organisation which supported not only Debras sister in her last days, but also her family. In the short space of time I have known Debra, I have only ever seen her smile. She has such a positive outlook on life which makes me question any bad days I have. As we get older I guess we’re all guilty of having a little moan as another birthday approaches. I did just last year, until Debra mentioned that she’s just grateful each year to be alive. Just to be around to celebrate another birthday. I’ll never complain at growing older again.

Then there’s Rachael. I’ve met Rachael only a handful of times, but this has been more than enough for her to leave a lasting impression. Rachael suffered firstly with anxiety, which then turned into depression, and the depression got deeper after the birth of her daughter Evie. She not only shares her experiences and talks about them openly on social media to raise awareness, but also runs a voluntary support group for other mums and dads feeling the same. Rachael does this all whilst still suffering bad days herself. She does it because she just wants to help others. To provide a support network for those suffering with post natal depression to let them know they are not alone. I strongly believe we need more advocates like this to talk about their experiences of living with mental health issues.

And Melanie. I’ve known Mel for almost 2 years now and she has had such a massive impact on my life. Overtime, I’ve realised she’s had a massive impact on quite a few lives. She’s our dance fitness instructor and she has brought so many women together, and she has literally transformed lives. It’s through going to Melanies classes I met both Rachael and Debra. I can’t talk for everyone else, but she’s give me back everything I ever lost, and everything I’ve never had.

But not only that. Melanie has also raised funds for a variety of charities. Her last one just last night hosting a family disco and raising £380 for Northumbria Bright. Melanie does all this whilst having a very busy life as a teacher, and mum of two gorgeous girls. She is truly awesome

These are just three women I know who selflessly spend so much of their time, making a difference to the lives of others, and they need to know just how amazing they are.

So next time you are touched by someone, what someone says, what someone does, tweet, blog, text, post, comment, and let them know how they or it made you feel. Tell people and tell them often just how much they matter. Not only to your life, but to the lives of others too.

depression, diet, excercise, general, health, health and fitness, lifestyle, mental health, wellbeing

10 Sure Fire Steps to Body Confidence

BY LOUISE SHARP | July 10, 2015

Low body confidence is an issue which affects all of us from time to time, irrespective of age and gender. It is recognised as a significant social and public health problem in the UK and throughout much of the rest of the world. Statistics show that 60% of adults say that they feel ashamed of the way they look. This feeling of shame often leads to engaging in less social interaction, leading to isolation, and in turn poor mental health.

Worryingly, evidence gathered by the YMCA shows that low body confidence in young people can lead to unsafe sex, drug and alcohol abuse, and youth unemployment. In addition to this, a report commissioned by the Government Equalities Office found that low body confidence is undermining academic confidence and performance in adolescent girls, with some even missing school due to their body image concerns. Some women are going as far as simply not turning up to work or job interviews, showing that body image concerns are even preventing women from reaching their potential and contributing socially and economically to society.

But we live in a culture where a woman’s thinness and beauty are highly valued, and where wealth and success are often considered to go hand in hand with this image of perfection. We’re fed images via the media of ridiculously thin but extremely glamorous women, and these images are seen by teenagers in a time when they are particularly susceptible to peer pressure.

Low body confidence is not exclusive to women and girls; men and boys suffer negative body image too, but are less likely to admit to being affected, as it is seen as less socially acceptable for men to admit to caring about what they look like enough to experience any hang-ups.

It is the aim of many advocacy groups to change the way the media portrays women, with national and international efforts being made to make marketers take responsibility for displaying unrealistic and unachievable images of both men and women. But we cannot simply reply upon a change in the media to change the way we feel about ourselves, as body confidence is not solely down to what we see. There are a range of social, cultural, psychological and biological factors that influence body image.

We need to act as individuals and change the way we perceive and feel about ourselves. So, what follows is ten tips for achieving body confidence: a mental detox to have you feeling better about yourself in no time.

1)  Surround Yourself With Positive People

Every day we are surrounded by and spend time with a variety of people, but negative people can affect your own outlook, particularly of your body image. Choose to be around people who will make you thrive, even if this does mean some drastic changes to your social life. The transformation should empower you, lift your mood, self-esteem and body confidence.

2) Recognise the Use of Image Manipulation, and That Altered Images Are Altering Our Minds

These ‘perfect’ images we see in media aren’t all they seem. Celebrities have spent hours in make up, photographed under strategically placed lighting and air-brushed to perfection. Blemishes are removed, limbs are lengthened and stomachs are flattened, as demonstrated in the below clip. Learn to recognise that these alterations are unrealistic and recognise the harm that they are doing to your own self-image.

3) Celebrate Your Body and All the Amazing Things It Can Do

Shift your focus away from what you body looks like to what it can do. Our bodies are our means of getting about, seeing, feeling, smelling. It is the means in which we come in contact and get to know the world. We should appreciate and respect it for that.

4) Make a List of Things You Like About Yourself, Read and Add to It Often

These things don’t have to be physical attributes. What you look like is only part of who you are. Think of all the things you do and do well, such as your ability to make others laugh when they most need it, your quirks, or your ability to smile even when things get hard. These are all qualities that need to be celebrated. And when the critical voices start making themselves known, there’s some evidence to the contrary.

5) Overpower Negative Thoughts With Positive Ones

We affirm statements about ourselves and the condition of our life with every thought and word we speak, and we practice this habit subconsciously. As we ponder over specific thoughts again and again, those thoughts become beliefs. Pretty soon these beliefs become our reality, and the condition of our wealth, health and relationships depends upon our habit of perception. Practicing positive affirmations is life changing. Use more positive self-talk. When you find yourself in the midst of a negative thought pattern, stop and replace it with an opposite statement. So stop hating yourself because you ‘look horrible’ and learn tell yourself that you love yourself unconditionally.

6) Exercise

Research indicates that exercise can help to improve body image. People who exercise and workout regularly are more likely to feel self-confident than those who are largely inactive. Body image is a strong component of self-esteem – and taking part in an activity that you enjoy, and that you gain a sense of accomplishment from, will help to build your self-esteem. Other benefits gained from exercise include overall better mood, sleep quality and energy, as well as reducing your risk of stress and depression. Exercise also releases endorphins which create feelings of happiness through euphoria.

7) Practice Self Acceptance

Self-acceptance is embracing yourself as you are right now.

“You really have to look inside yourself and find your own inner strength, and say, ‘I’m proud of what I am and who I am, and I’m just going to be myself.”

– Mariah Carey

To get to a place of self-acceptance you have to be able to know and understand who you are, which is likely to mean making some changes. You may have to face some fears and step outside of your comfort zone. It’s about separating who you are from what you’ve done, and understanding that everyone makes mistakes, and that’s how we learn and grow.

8) Don’t Compare Yourself to Others

Everyone has something they wish they could change about their body. Wishing you had someone else’s hair, smile, or teeth takes away from what uniquely is you. Learn to accentuate the qualities you like and minimize the things you don’t. Start to look for beauty everywhere, particularly in places you wouldn’t ordinarily expect to find it, then you will learn to find it in yourself. You might not be able to squeeze into those size 8 jeans, but you still have that killer hair.

9) Focus on What You Have the Power to Change

If you want to change something about yourself, do it. If it’s your hair you don’t like, try a new haircut. If you’re unhappy about your weight, look into changing your diet or maybe joining an exercise class. The sooner you start making the changes, the sooner you will start to feel better about yourself.

10) Invest Your Time and Energy More Wisely

Rather than worrying about food, calories and your weight, use that time and energy to do something to help others, whether it’s an individual, or even getting involved in charity work. Sometimes reaching out to other people can help us feel better about ourselves and make a positive change to our world.

And that’s it! Do you have any tips we haven’t covered here? Be sure to let us know in the comments below.